books · personal

Trusting God

1465095074279My spiritual fight has many ups and downs. I was always in a place of questioning God’s love. If God is in control how can He allow hardship?? There are times i grow weary from the journey.. when i went through my period of depression (poor decisions, medical issues, finances, broken relationships) I was just close to giving up. Adversity is hard to endure and can be even harder to understand. Suicide then was my only option to end up everything (the struggle and the pain)…….

personal

Reflection: When in Doubt

‘Overwhelmed with worry and doubt’ -is what my heart is feeling right now. I always feel like I’m just failing God. My faith is faltering and giving up has always been an option. This is who I am, when difficult time comes, it is easy for me to doubt and grow overwhelmed thinking it’s never going to work out. It is so frustrating knowing that my faith in God is unstable. Why I can’t throw all these doubts away? I have been missing out life’s great opportunities all because of doubt. How can I doubt God’s love? How can I doubt His faithfulness? When storms of life surrounds me, it’s hard for me to rely on God’s promises. I am drawing myself in fear and worry instead of getting in touch with Him. A lot of times i tried to fix things my way, I didn’t allow God to take control of my situation.

Doubt/doubting is toxic, it is poisonous and it is the thing that keeps on destroying my faith over and over. It is easy for me to abandon my spiritual disciplines every time my heart is in doubt. It is the ‘doubt’ in my heart that keeps me from fully believing and trusting God’s faithfulness. -and I’m scared! I’ve got a heart full of doubt.

friends · personal

Throwing it back to the glory dorm days

When I first set foot in the ‘City of Love’, I was terrified that I may not be able to find a good place to stay and friends to hang out with. Not that I don’t know somebody or anyone, in-fact I have lots of relatives in Iloilo and mostly from my father’s side which I haven’t meet until I came there for college. Continue reading “Throwing it back to the glory dorm days”